As happens every Spring, I decide that I need more dresses. I love wearing dresses, but I have no where near as many as I would like. I also don't have anywhere near enough money to buy all of the dresses I would like, so I've been looking at relatively affordable options.
I thought that Forever21 might be a good idea, since I have found nice pieces there in the past.
And I did find a few cute looking dresses on their website.
But the number of cute dresses was far overshadowed by the sheer amount of wtf dresses. I can't even call them all ugly, because some of them just make NO SENSE.
Here are pictures of a few of my favorite wtf dresses.
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This is an
"Origami Satin Dress" in navy blue. Not quite sure what part of it is Origami, but hey. It's part of the "Twelve by Twelve" line, which "offers a more sophisticated, modest fit than FOREVER 21."
Now, I have no idea what that means, because to me, this just looks wrong. I mean, where are you supposed to wear this? It's almost completely polyester and dry clean only, which translates to me: stuffy, uncomfortable and pointlessly expensive and difficult to clean. Plus, do you see those sleeve-things? Those scream itchy to me.
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Now, I love mermaids as much as the next girl, and when I was 7 my goal in life was to become Ariel, but that does not mean that I would EVER wear
this dress.
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If any of you had dreams of dressing like a combination of Xena and a dominatrix, but doing it in a fun, summery kind of way,
here's your dress.
If not, I'd steer clear of this dress which has somehow managed to make this size OO mannequin look like a cow.
For those of you who would rather look like a Barbie, though,
here's the
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dress for YOU. There could be no other possible inspiration for this dress than to make the wearer look as much like a Barbie as possible; the biggest flaw, in my eyes, is that the designer hasn't seen a Barbie since the 80s.
Th
is dress is shameful. It's a mullet dress. That is all.
And now we come to... this...
dress. 
I know when I go shopping, I look for outfits that make my hips and thighs look bigger, and accentuate my boobs to a point just short of painting actual nipples on the fabric.
I can't imagine this dress was designed by a woman. Or anyone who ever saw a woman... or spoke with a woman... or... looked at a woman. Seriously.
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And finally, the always classy, I'm-faking-pregnant
dress. Because that's ever a good idea.